When I Was 41
By Shelly W. Santaniello

Shelly Santaniello (left) and her student Rachel shared a special moment that neither of them will ever forget.

The day before my Uncle Norm died, I happened to have a writing conference with Rachel, one of my third graders. The class had been working on their "When I Was" stories – personal narratives about a significant event in their lives. The pieces are modeled after James Stevenson's story When I Was Nine (Greenwillow, 1986), in which he reflects on the simpler days of his childhood.

Rachel proudly shared with me her beautiful story, titled "When I Was Six." It was about her uncle's death, and I couldn't help thinking about Uncle Norm, who'd been suffering from Alzheimer's disease for several years. I'd spoken to my aunt just a few days before, and she told me hospice had been called. Uncle Norm was in the final stages of this dreadful disease, and it wouldn't be long before we'd lose him.

Moved to tears. Rachel's piece about her uncle was filled with the clear, descriptive images that Barry Lane, in his book After THE END: Teaching and Learning Creative Revision (Heinemann, 1992), calls "snapshots." Rachel also used Lane's technique of "exploding the moment," or stretching out every detail in one important moment of a story. She wrote that she felt like "exploding with tears" when she learned that her uncle had passed away.

As Rachel read, tears streamed down my face. I explained to Rachel about my uncle, who was near death. The two of us shared a special moment that I'm sure neither will soon forget.

The next day, my mother called to tell me Uncle Norm had passed away. Again, tears ran down my cheeks. When you lose someone you love, it's okay to cry, whether you're six or 41.

Putting it "out there." How wonderful it is that, within the framework of Writers' Workshop, our students can write about what really matters to them. I did just that – I shared the story of my uncle's death with my students. After the initial read-aloud, I used my story as a teaching tool – for instance, pointing out several similes about crying. In a mini-lesson, the children were asked to identify the similes I had used and to generate their own similes about expressing sadness.

A bridge of words. I encourage all teachers to occasionally share their writing with their students. Students love hearing their teachers' writing, no matter the length, no matter the genre. When we share our writing, we share a piece of ourselves. When we invest ourselves in the classroom community building process, we show our students that we're all connected, whether we're six or 41.

The Tenth Good Thing About Barney by Judith Viorst (Aladdin, 1987)

The Accident by Donald and Carol Carrick (Houghton
Mifflin, 1981)

The Terrible Thing That Happened at Our House by Marge Blaine (Scholastic, 1988)

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst (Aladdin, 1987)