Laugh Lines October 2005

Speechless
It was "picture day," and one particular student in my class was dressed so nicely that I exclaimed, "Charlie, you are too cute for words today!" His speech therapy teacher came by a little while later and asked him to read his weekly spelling words to her – to which he replied, "I thought I was too cute for words today!"
Lindsay Perkins
St. Louis, MO

A for Effort
We were working on map skills in my first grade classroom one afternoon. I explained that there are 50 states and they each have a capital, and then gave out all sorts of information on our state, Alabama. In summary, I asked, "So, what is the capital of Alabama?" To which my students replied, "A."
Laurie Myer
Atmore, AL

Following Instructions
In order to protect instructional time, I asked my second graders to use the restroom during recess, if possible. Thus, it surprised me one day when two girls felt it necessary to tell me that a student had gone to the bathroom during recess. "That's when you're supposed to go," I told them. "Yes," they replied, "but not behind the tree."
Mary J. Hamilton
Chesapeake, VA

He Could Be Right…
One day my class was reading a book on nocturnal animals. When one little boy was asked what sound a raccoon makes at night, he adamantly stated, "Don't hit me on the road!"
Deanna Gnage
Rushville, NY

24/7
As I walked around the room helping my kindergarten students here and there, one of the kids looked up thoughtfully and asked, "After you get off of school, do you go to work?"
Gloria Thudium
Baton Rouge, LA

To the Letter
After I passed back papers one day, I noticed a young man taking some of his papers to the trash can. I asked him what he was doing, and he responded that his mother informed him only to bring home A's, so he was throwing out the ones that didn't have A's on them. Sixth graders can be so literal.
Amy Rahne
Morrison, CO

Quiet Time
I was attending a teaching conference and the presenter was trying to get everyone to be quiet. She calmly said, "I'll wait until you stop talking," and we instantly became a good audience. I thought her sentence would be a good strategy to use on my very talkative first grade class. The next day, the kids were busy socializing and I said, "I'll wait until you stop talking." I looked around in amazement when they continued to talk! I made eye contact with one of my students, and she said with the most polite manners, "OK, and thanks for waiting. We'll be done in a little while." Needless to say, that was the last time I uttered those words!
Colleen Kell
Austin, TX